I met you when I was battling with the demons in my head. You came unexpected and froze everything including my sanity and what’s keeping me awake. The ray of sunshine to light the darkness devouring me dead. I thought you were fixing me but I didn’t know you were slowly cutting deep. I bleed while you sink with your demons and I’m already there beneath. I lay there with each madness, fighting them with kindness, fighting them with bruised and crippled heart that needed to be bandaged. Your eyes are hollowed to see what it has done to me. To you, I’m just the girl who has sinned that needed your sunshine. To me, You were the boy I put everything on the line.
I ask myself why do I always do this? Why do I complicate love and choose to get hurt? And I laugh while I choke on my tears. Why do people smoke even though it’s bad for them? I love like I breath in smoke, letting my fragile lungs burn with it just so I’ll know where it hurts. Breath out smoke that blinds my eye like it blinds everything toxic. Let my system feel everything like it’s a strange blur of happiness and I found myself wanting and wanting to get more in. To feel the taste of it on my lips, let that smell stay on my fingertips. Let everything stay and never let go like my heart has never let go of him. I know I’ll never learn like I’ll never know the art of unloving. Like I’ll never know what truly is forgetting.
Have you ever counted the minutes on how long you miss someone? Most people counted days but my days felt longer as I watch the clock tick every now and then like I’m able to conjure your face or name on every surface. I counted the seconds and minutes like I’ve been counting them forever. I’ve been counting the hours till it turns into a day, I’ve been counting every longing like they bleed from my veins, I’ve been counting, been counting still until these feelings fade away.
How do I make you feel that I love you when everything comes in words and distance. I love you in oceans and waves when the time is the enemy I had when I never met you.
Time is the only thing I have now to see you. I think of you with clocks in my head, wanting it to stop, wanting it to go back.
I love you like this: looking at the same sky in different clocks. looking at you in glass windows that connects the world between us.
Look but can never touch.
I hope I could kiss you
and let these words
sink into your lips
let your tongue taste it
savor these words for real
“I love you”
Holistic and inspiring …
A migraine is something that I never experienced in my life but I know that it is far worse than my regular headaches and I get super irritated when I have it especially when it’s nearing my period. So I am quite intrigued when I was reading this book. It gave me more information about Migraines and what one might experience when the attack comes and how a migraine can take control of your life once you succumb to it.
Now I know that every “migraineur” have different ways on how to handle the attack, and also the pain varies. My brother has migraines but it’s milder compared to what the writer experienced. I find this book very helpful to people who don’t know what to do with their migraines. Or their medicine wasn’t doing much to alleviate the pain. In this book, the writer described the pain she felt and the intensity of each. And also gave her own tips on how she handles her migraines. And by tips, I mean there’s a lot of them including what food to eat and shouldn’t. Scents, lotions, and creams you shouldn’t put on your body that might trigger a migraine. She even had her own menu and homemade products you can try so that you won’t have to worry about these things. From diet to exercise to things we ingest and put on, the book got everything covered, I find these things very helpful how much more to a migraineur.
When you live with a migraine all your life all you can do is to accept it but also realize that a migraine will control you only if you let it. So you have to make that change. And reading this book will inspire you to make that change.
(A digital ARC was given to me by T Stedman in exchange for an honest review)
Rating 4/5 stars
The book is out today. Make sure to check it out for out.
Today I woke up from the dream of you kissing my breasts and it still lingers like I’m being kissed by the sun and it warms me up inside. You already have my mind and in with each day passing, you started to have my heart.
I have written my heart out like it’s been bruised and cut open, like a gallery of broken things. I hurt you but I’m more broken inside than you do. And isn’t that ironic? To be broken when it’s you that I’ve hurt.
I’m trying to fix it, making beauty out of disaster but the more I fix it the more I break. Because broken people can’t fix each other, they can only heal together. But you know, bruised as this heart may be, it’s still beating. And even though you’ve taken everything in me, I realized I still have more to give because I’m here and I still live.
we are a mess together
but we are a beautiful mess
a mess fit for poetry
because it’s you and me
We’re still looking at each other
but the space between us
is further away
I got high and drunk
with you in bliss
when you left
I was drowning
in a lonely abyss